Living in the LymeLight: Paradox and Spirit

LymeLight Intro Link

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There’s more to healing than the physical. In this series I share ten body/mind/spirit practices to help us live in the LymeLight, from stealthy back to healthy. Each will be posted separately during the holiday season.

  • Allow
  • Pace
  • Load
  • Paradox and Spirit
  • Gratitude
  • Balance
  • Movement and Exercise
  • Discernment and Intuition
  • States of Mind and Emotion
  • Responsibility and Power



Paradox and Spirit

Photo by Alison Jones

Paradox is the spiritual path.

I am Spirit. Life is more than a story about bodies. I am not the sick body, and neither are you. Neither am I the body that used to be well. I am that which transcends all concepts of variable health and death. These moments where the life I used to live is out of reach offer a tremendous opportunity to know myself differently, more deeply, more essentially. The joke is, it seems I’m too sick to take advantage of this or any calling right now. But I’m not. Even if it’s all I can muster, I can let go, go with the flow and allow.

Illness draws focus to the body, but increased body focus doesn’t necessarily mean “less spiritual.” Lack of energy, brain fog, pain and more self-care may mean less spiritual practice, but this too is instructive. Just as I am not my body or my job or my relationship, I am not my spiritual practice.

My main spiritual practice through the worst of my illness was to mentor my own mind and vet the thoughts I entertained. I rule my mind, which I alone must rule. My performance was better some days than others.


Chronic illness imposes strident limits on range, energy, endurance and resources. If all things are possible with God, under the thumb of chronic Lyme it certainly doesn’t feel that way. Instead, the limitations focus our attention on what’s wrong, busy us at the survival level and tempt us to doubt principles we cherish.

If all things work together for good, how is it that the God-kissed dream I was manifesting is all but dead in its tracks? How is it that I have no energy, endurance and patience for my creation (children, projects, business, relationships, studies)?

If peace and joy are my inheritance, where are they as I plod through the day in a painful fog, waiting for the moment when I can stop?

If I am spirit, not a body, why is this wailing, failing body the only thing that holds my focus?

Here’s the thing about the dead duck energy-crash—when the cells are not generating enough fuel for all the body’s activities. Every expenditure, whether physical, mental or emotional, reduces the energy available for other acts of thinking, feeling or doing. It’s like diving into a shallow pool; you’re more likely to hit the bottom. When we’re sick at this level, resources are quickly used up by basic survival activities.

When the body is starving, give it food.

My body’s cries for help had to be answered. Until they were, my energy had to go into making it through the day while searching out the nature of my sickness, learning how to heal and implementing my findings. Some bodily healing had to be accomplished before I could live again in the spirituality I cherish. I had to regain some energy to understand my dreams aren’t dead. I had to pacify the pain to restore peace and the quiet joy that accompanies it. My nervous system had to begin to unjangle.

All things work together for good.
There are no exceptions except in the ego’s [fearful self] judgment.
The ego exerts maximal vigilance about what it permits into awareness,
and this is not the way a balanced mind holds together.
(A Course in Miracles Text Chapter 4.V.1-3)

It makes sense that sickness, being of the ego thought system, would carve an opportunity for ego consciousness to more easily dominate. Not a complete takeover, but greasing the slide, abetting a fall into well-worn fearful grooves.

Body focus isn’t the same as being directed by the ego thought system. Giving in to fear is the hallmark of the ego thought system. Sick or well, it’s always important to carefully choose the thoughts we entertain. Allow the dark and scary thoughts to pass by. Cling to the truth that you are created in God’s Image and thus are a powerful creator. Tether to the freedom of peace and right-mindedness. From this heart, wellness will spring again in wondrous ways. And in the darkest hours, the Holy Spirit will whisper Love in your ear.


The sick body imposes limitations. But freedom is not in bodies or actions. (Actions are doorways at best.) Freedom is in the spirit. Freedom is a feeling. So, we can embody it even in unlikely places.

Some of my spiritual practice was on hold, but not spirituality. I affirmed my faith and path with prayer upon awakening, then coasted through the day while supervising and choosing my thoughts. The goal isn’t to banish negative thoughts—especially unlikely during illness. The practice is to recognize my own negative thoughts as quickly as possible and choose not to keep them. They come and go, but they are not me or mine. They may contain a grain of truth, but they and their predictions are not the truth.

There is positive purpose to be mined from illness. It’s not a mean-spirited detour in the life you’re meant to live. All things work together for good. Illness is neither a punishment nor a test. It’s just another opportunity.


I’ve been on the conscious spiritual path about 26 years, yet going with the flow still doesn’t come easily. What better immersion training than an illness with serious mental and bodily effects that stymies my small self’s (ego’s) “big plans?” Please laugh with me here.

Now add these inconvenient truths about chronic Lyme:

  • The high probability my illness won’t get diagnosed.
  • Conventional treatment works only when given within a few days of infection.
  • Insurance companies, medical boards and the CDC deny the illness even exists.
  • All or some of my illness may originate in botched bioweapons experiments.

What choice do I have but to allow the chronic Lyme situation to be what it is?

My choices lie in how I respond and how I use the resources available to me.

Creative Respiration

You are a child of God. You deserve your inheritance from The Source. The inheritance is a creative respiration, a vibrant beingness attracting and exuding endless blessings within the framework of Supreme Will. Healing, abundance, ease, vitality—all are Willed to us, and will manifest in the big picture. However, we may be surprised by the way they show up. Still, we are part of the flow of All That Is Good.

Let faith cradle you through painful and pessimistic days. Let faith cheer each increment of recovery. Sickness is not forever. There is no adversity without an inherent gift to be claimed. The ill are no different than God’s other children, and nothing can truly change God’s creation.

I am not a body. I am free. For I am still as God created me.

Keep your eye peeled for spiritual sustenance. I dug into part of a song I liked (Exactly As It Is by Miten with Deva Premal), and found the Hanuman mantra, which happens to be perfect for chronic illness. Said to form a bridge between the physical and the spiritual, chanting or singing the Hanuman mantra creates energy for a physical task or bodily healing.

OM Hum Hanumate Vijayam


Hinduism is not my religion. I sing mantra occasionally, when it resonates. My body buzzes with calm energy and contentment when I sing OM Hum Hanumate Vijayam.


To allow is deeply spiritual. Allowing implies trust; trust and faith walk hand in hand. Even though things may look, feel and be bad, the story doesn’t end here. Allow it to play out. Listen and learn. Do the next right thing.

I rule my mind, which I alone must rule.

All things are possible with God.

All things work together for good.

Peace and joy are my inheritance.

I am spirit.

I am not a body. I am free. For I am still as God created me.

Sounds so crazy it just might be true.

Lean on faith and sound spiritual principles. If you lack faith, faith could be a gift from your illness. Will you claim it?

healing-loss-small-cover-outlined-e1495905246179.jpgWith Peace and Love,

Mira Carroll

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Next up:  Gratitude

2 Responses to “Living in the LymeLight: Paradox and Spirit”
  1. Elaine says:

    Always helpful to read your perspective.

    Liked by 1 person

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